SHANIE RYAN
PRESENTER I PODCASTER I PROPERTY EXPERT I LIFESTYLE INFLUENCER
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Shanie Ryan January 24, 2021

SLEEP BLOG WITH CHEEKY TINKERS MATERNITY – PART 2

Continued… PART 2

See your babies awake time below: Check out the table below and see if your baby is exceeding
theirs? On the flip side maybe they are not awake for long enough…

It is also good to know that around the age of 10-12 weeks old, your babies internal body clock starts to
regulate itself. They will soon come to learn that difference between night and day, and if you have had that
important sleep environment sorted, then the rest will go a little more smoothly. Managing those awake times
will also help with that transition and make your bedtime routines easier to manage.

A little bit of science behind the sleep!

Ensuring your baby gets that natural daylight during your day, fresh air, these external factors help to build up
your baby’s melatonin levels as natural daylight prohibits that melatonin during the day and so when night-
time arrives and your baby is put to sleep in a darkened room, their pineal gland starts to release that build-up
of melatonin hormone which then helps them to feel relaxed, sleepy and gives them that ability to drift off to
sleep.

What we do want to limit in babies is their stress hormone which is called cortisol. Cortisol, which you may or
may not have heard of before, is known as the hormone which wakes baby or is released when your baby is
stressed or upset. Our cortisol levels are at their lowest during the night and start to rise around 4am onwards
which is why babies may start to stir, feed at that time or if they are in a bright room, or if the sun is creeping
in, your baby may be wide awake and ready to party at that time! Therefore, keeping your room nice and dark,
calm, block out those external noises and distractions is key in getting your baby back to sleep!
Speaking about awake times above and now knowing how long your baby may be capable of staying awake
between their feed and sleeps, this allows us to keep those naps on track and reduce the possibility of your
baby becoming overtired. Remember those overtired cues I mentioned?! It is at that point, when your baby is
crying, fractious and stressed, that their cortisol levels will rise, causing your baby to feel unsettled, struggle to
sleep, to feed, and it can feel like you are simply battling at every opportunity to settle your little one, all whilst
getting nowhere! This can leave you feeling upset, questioning your parenting, when in fact, it is all about the
science behind the sleep! Cortisol is like the equivalent of having a few red bulls before bed! So, imagine trying
to drift off with all that caffeine and sugar in your system! Impossible.


Sometimes just being aware of all the sleep science, making those Cheeky Tweaks to your routine can help to
improve your situation. There are obviously more complex cases, that require more work to be done, a sleep
plan to be sent and more guidance needed to improve your sleep and get the results you desperately seek.
Just know that babies from 4 weeks to 6 months and even beyond, no current situation is permanent, babies
go through so many changes, both developmentally and mentally as they grow. Phases do often pass and in
time can improve by themselves. Of course as baby becomes more aware and potentially also becomes used
to certain sleep associations, for example rocking, feeding or being held to sleep, you can reach a point maybe
when your baby is around 4-6 months, where you just want to try an alternative way. It is only when your
situation is no longer sustainable that changes can be made. That being said, if a certain method works for you
and you have read somewhere that it should be done in a different way, then you do not need to change
anything because the literature tells you so, if you are happy , your baby is happy then continue as you are.
Ultimately it is no one else’s business how you choose to get your baby to sleep, so do not listen to potential
negative comments. It is important to stress that it is your choice.


I can assure you that there are lots of gentle methods to choose from. If you feel that your current situation is
no longer working and if that lack of sleep starts to affect your mental health and your well-being, potentially
your close relationships too, which can happen, then reach out and get that support.
As a Gentle Baby Sleep Coach, my methods are varied, I offer choice, gentle and slow changes which I am able
to guide you through, step by step, until you can see that light at the end of the tunnel and you feel confident
enough and safe in knowledge that you have made that positive shift and can now get that sleep you deserve!

I really hope you found this blog useful! Please do not hesitate to check out my website and Instagram Page
for more helpful information, my services and many tips and tricks that may help to improve your sleep!

www.cheekytinkersmaternity.com

Search for me on Instagram using @cheekytinkers_maternity.
Happy Sleeping everyone!

Louise xXx

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Shanie Ryan December 13, 2020

Breast Feeding for first time Mama’s

Breast Feeding for first time Mama’s

So many of you asked for this blog post instalment, but I was VERY reluctant to speak about such a personal and important part of my journey as a new mummy until I felt like I had personally nailed it and could speak from experience. Let me start by saying, i’ve yet to speak to a new mum who has found breastfeeding a walk in the park, so if you are having any difficulty no matter how big or small then please know that you are not alone.

From the time I fell pregnant I instinctively knew that I wanted to exclusively breast feed my baby. I was determined to push past any problems to ensure that me and my baby could have a positive bonding feeding experience. So I think that is a good place to start, I believe having that time during pregnancy to read about breastfeeding from the experts and tapping into real life experiences from other mums online, allowed me to be mentally prepared for the potential problems with breastfeeding before the birth and the baby blues kicked in. Doing my research allowed me to know exactly what I wanted for me and my son and to be firm in my determination to make it happen. I also made a promise to myself to never quit breastfeeding on a bad day. 

During my personal breast feeding experience we tackled an undiagnosed double anterior tongue tie 100% which is basically the worst type of tongue tie he could have. We tackled nipple thrush; which is quite simply as painful as child birth, and we continue to tackle reflux. I have to be authentic here and tell you that the first 3 months of breastfeeding were really tough at times. There were moments that my nipples were so painful that I would procrastinate in feeding him even when he was crying for food. It was so I could try to psych myself up for the 20 minutes of complete agony ahead. BUT… I am pleased to share that right now I am having the most wonderful bonding experience with my son, and I am loving every moment of nourishing his little body with my breast milk. I am also pleased to report that I am pain free.

So with that said, I wanted to share my quick guide to breastfeeding having now survived everything that could go wrong… going wrong!

"Do Your Research"

Thanks to lockdown 1.0 I had plenty of time to “read the baby books”. So when it came to breastfeeding I chose a book that has been around since 2009 and continues to receive great reviews. It is written by author and midwife Ina May Gaskin and it is based on decades of her experience in caring for pregnant women, mothers, and babies. The book covers helpful advice, medical facts, and real-life stories that will help you understand how to breastfeed successfully and how you can use it to more deeply connect with your baby and your own body. It also covered subjects such as weaning and breastfeeding challenges along with how to overcome them. This book gave me confidence going into breastfeeding which I believe is half the battle already won. 

I also used Instagram and blogs not too dis-similar to this one to tap into other new mums experiences. I didn’t want to go into this believing it was all going to be a fairy tale bonding session, I wanted to be realistic.

"GET A LACTATION CONSULTANT ON SPEED DIAL"

Let me just begin by saying that lactation consultants are worth every single penny spent on them! Now i’ve cleared that up, let me share with you exactly why I make that statement.

Within 24 hours of River being born I spotted what I suspected was a tongue tie. Whilst in hospital I flagged my concerns with the midwife on the ward, the midwife who did his 9 point check and also with the on site breast feeding “expert”. Every single person who checked him said he did not have a tongue tie, he was latching well and appeared to be feeding sufficiently so there were no concerns. My motherly instincts were simply brushed aside. Fast forward one week, at this point my nipples had become sensitive, red, cracked and sore, so when I was back in hospital to deal with some post birth complications I asked one of the midwives to check him, once again I received the exact same response. Fast forward another two weeks… my nipples have turned white in colour, there is a weird flaming pattern on my areola, it is literally painful to wear a bra and to shower and I am wincing every time River latched. To be quite honest, I was dreading every single feed. At this point my partner reminded me that I had actually researched a lactation consultant during pregnancy just in case we needed help, so he insisted that I book an appointment. Katherine Fisher (https://katherinefisher.co.uk/) was an absolute godsend. Within 2 minutes of our arrival she confirmed that not only did River have a tongue tie, he had a double anterior tongue tie that was 100% in its severity. She said it was shameful that so many medical professionals had missed this but that it is sadly a very common story. She said  “it is a miracle that either of you are managing to breast feed”. I cannot tell you how relieved  I was that someone had diagnosed the problem and could instantly help us. Tongue tie is extremely common and occurs in approximately 11% of newborn babies. The NHS lists all of the signs to look out for and confirms that not only can tongue tie cause problems with breast feeding but it can also cause problems with eating certain foods and speech problems later on in your child’s life. (https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/tongue-tie/)

Depending on who you speak with there may be denial that tongue tie causes speech issues, but it is listed as a concern on the NHS website and plenty of people from our parents generation will claim that a speech problem was eventually linked to an undiagnosed tongue tie. 

Katherine snipped Rivers tongue tie on the spot, within seconds I noticed the difference. Previously Rivers average feed time was 45 – 60 minutes long, following the procedure he did a full feed in 15 minutes. He was so much happier in himself and it was so cute watching him discover his tongue being able to move and poke out for the first time. I genuinely would recommend that every parent with even the slightest suspicion that their baby might have a tongue tie get it checked out by a trained lactation consultant, Midwives and post natal healthcare professionals are sadly not trained in tongue tie diagnoses or treatment hence why so many get missed. Trust me going private is worth every penny! The NHS does have a referral system but that can take up to 8 weeks and they will only treat baby if the baby cannot feed because of it, sadly there seems to be less concern for mothers comfort or potential future speech issues within the NHS. 

"WHY DOES NOBODY TELL YOU ABOUT NIPPLE THRUSH?"

  • Itchy or burning nipples that appear fiery red, shiny, flaky, and/or have a rash with tiny blisters.
  • Discolouration of the nipples – turning bright red or completely white.
  • Cracked nipples.
  • Shooting pains in the breast  tissue during or after feedings.
  • Intense nipple or deep breast pain that is not improved with better latch-on and positioning.

These are all common symptoms of nipple thrush… firstly breast feeding is NOT supposed to be painful, however if nobody talks about nipple thrush how are we to know to look out for it! It is also worth mentioning that most of the mama’s I have spoken with who’s little ones had a tongue tie, also experienced nipple thrush! Perhaps connected???

Again hooray for my lactation consultant! As soon as she had diagnosed River’s nipple thrush she asked to see my nipples… Instantly she said ” oh you poor thing, you must be in agony, does it hurt to shower?” 

“Ermmm yes it bloody hurt to shower, everything hurt my nipples, even the sheets in bed” I said.

Following my diagnosis, I wondered how on earth did I not know about this and it became apparent that it was because non of my mummy friends ever spoke about it. It was not that some of them hadn’t experienced it. I think the word “thrush” just doesn’t sound nice does it? so therefore people don’t speak about it. I mean I get it, before I became pregnant, I had never ever had thrush in my life. Then boom, i’m pregnant and I get vaginal thrush, then I give birth and its oral and nipple thrush! I was horrified at first, but then I though f*#k it! Its not my fault, its a yeast problem not a STI for goodness sake Lol. 

Treatment was simple, oral drops for River and Nipple cream for me, however it is HIGHLY contagious so River and I kept passing it back and forth until eventually I returned to the doctor for an an anti fungal tablet ‘Fluconazole’ prescription which cleared the problem in 2 weeks. I will be honest nipple thrush is a ball ache and it hurts like hell so the earlier you get treatment the better. A friend of mine waited and tried the holistic natural remedy approach at first but it sadly didn’t work for her and she resorted to the tablets just like I did. 

Here is a little run down of my nipple thrush saviours…

Nipple Shields – These helped when it became far to painful ( however make sure you wash them in boiling water as only hot can kill a fungal infection)

Nipple cream – I used Lansinoh nipple balm, this was great to sooth the nipples during feeds as you must remove the fungal cream during feeds.

Silky PJ’s – At night a silky texture was the least irritating to my nipples .

Support & Encouragement – Don’t underestimate the power of the support of your partner, mum or a friend to keep going. This pain will pass, so whatever you do, don’t quit on a bad day!

"Pumping is a full time job!"

Now that my breastfeeding experience is so much more enjoyable, and now that I am no longer going through the wars so to speak, I can truly say that I love breastfeeding. I enjoy the time bonding with my son, I cherish our connection and I LOVE the way his little eyes look deep into mine when he is feeding. But the problem is when he isn’t near me I need to bloody pump. Pumping is NOT rewarding people! Its boring, it is time consuming, and the set up / clean up is a mission in itself. I write this as I sit in my dressing room at QVC after spending the first night away from my 4 month old baby, I still have 10 hours left at work and i’ve already had to pump 6 times (*Rolls eyes).  

Being self employed I needed to be able to pump quite soon after birth so I decided to explore the wonderful world of breast pumps to establish what would work for me and my lifestyle. I think this is definitely the key to choosing a breast pump… when do you need to pump, at home? whilst driving? at work? only when you look at your lifestyle do I truly believe that you can pick the correct pump for you.

After reviewing TONNES of breast pumps, I settled on two different ones…. 

  • The Elvie Double Breast Pump – £449.00

This is a revolutionary new to the market product that allows women to pump discreetly and quietly. Im talking you can pump at your desk or whilst filling your car with petrol and no one would know kind of discreet.  Its completely quiet, and fits snuggly into your bra. No wires, no tubes and no bottles hanging from your chest like you belong in a dairy farm. Its all connected to an app on your phone, is USB chargeable as well so thats a super useful feature. I am currently using this now whilst working at QVC, it is perfect to use with a cold water steriliser as well ( I use the Milton one £12.99 from Amazon).

What is included:

  • 2 Hubs
  • 4 Bottles (5oz/150ml, BPA free)
  • 2 Breast Shield (24mm)
  • 2 Breast Shield (28mm)
  • 4 Valves
  • 4 Spouts
  • 4 Seals
  • 4 Storage Lids
  • 4 Bra Adjusters
  • 2 USB Charging Cables
  • 2 Carry Bags
  • Instructions for Use
  • Medela Freestyle Flex 2 Phase Double Breast Pump – £349.99

This brand is one of the most highly awarded brands in the market. This electric breast pump is perfect for pumping at home or in a private space. It produces an outstanding 11% more milk than any other pump on the market due to its technology that very closely mimics the suckling of a real baby. Its not as quiet or discreet at the Elvie but in terms of being effective this is your best friend. This is my at home breast pump, when it doesn’t matter how I look (Thank god as I look like I belong in a dairy farm when using this pump Lol), but it is great for getting a lot of milk very quickly (10-15 minutes max). 

What is included: 1 x Freestyle Flex™ double electric breast pump
2 x Medela PersonalFit Flex™ breast shield size 21 mm
2 x Medela PersonalFit Flex™ breast shield size 24 mm
2 x Medela PersonalFit Flex™ connector
1 x tubing
4 x 150 ml breast milk bottle
4 x lid
2 x bottle stand
1 x power adaptor with USB cable
1 x carry bag
1 x cooler with cooler element

The reason I opted for both is I wanted the Elvie for work purposes such as pumping in the dressing room at QVC where I would rather use the discreet option, however when at home the Medela was my top choice to ensure my pumping time is the most effective and I am getting the most milk possible for baby. 

So there you have it, we have covered, breast feeding prep, tongue tie, nipple thrush, and pumping. Breast feeding is a personal choice, it isn’t easy but no one ever told me it would be. Most women quit within the first 8 weeks of breast feeding and having experienced the worst of it I completely understand why. However, I know that with a little support, lots more open conversations around it and by managing a new mummies expectations a lot more ladies would be likely to stick with it for longer. If I am honest it took 3 months for me to settle into breast feeding and to really begin to actually enjoy it, but trust me it is definitely worth the wait! 


Much Love

Shanie xXx


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Shanie Ryan October 4, 2020

My Birth Story

My Birth Story

If you follow me on Instagram (@Shanie_Ryan) you will know I have just uploaded some of the  realist, raw and personal images that I will ever post… They are the images of my birth story.

I decided that I couldn’t share so much of my pregnancy with you all via my social media and blog to then just ignore birth, and not talk about the labour especially when so many of you have reached out to me asking about my birth story…

I also thought it was important to reassure all of the pregnant ‘mummy’s to be’ out there that despite Covid 19 and all of the restrictions that remain in place around birth partners, that the midwives are going above & beyond to ensure your birth experience is not far from the normal experience. I can tell you that my midwives were amazing from start to finish and seemed to think the restrictions still being in place were ridiculous. They we’re very flexible with the “rules” so do try not to worry.

My little boy River was 4 weeks old yesterday, so I decided it was time to watch back my birth video. What an amazing experience to be able to re-live it, to watch it back, and to recall what happened, it really helped me to process my birth story. It helped me to feel proud of myself for getting through it without screaming the entire place down and to enjoy the moment he was born again only this time without the discomfort Lol.

Rivers Birth Story;
Location: East Surrey Hospital Birthing Centre.

Pain Relief: Gas & Air 

Birth: Instrumental Ventouse Delivery 

Labour Time: 12 Hours.

So firstly, let me just say that I look back on my labour and birth as a positive experience, but that is not to say it wasn’t hard nor did it all go to plan!
Overall I had 80% of the experience I had wished for and included in my birth plan. The reason I feel that despite needing intervention during my birth, I still had a positive birth experience was because I took the time to create a detailed seven page birth preferences document that covered every scenario. I insisted that my care providers had read and understood what I needed to feel safe and supported during my labour. My fiance Tony had also studied the document and knew exactly what I was hoping for and therefore he was very vocal and controlled the room on my behalf.

I went into labour at 5am. It started when I woke up to a bad tummy ache, (I had a spicy Indian the night before, so my first thought it was just the food) so I emptied my bowels completely. 15 minutes later I needed the bathroom again and noticed that my mucus plug had come out (also known as your bloody show).  At that point I then realised my tummy ache was in fact the start of my labour. I started timing my contractions on the Freya App and after an hour bouncing on my birthing ball in the kitchen I woke Tony up to let him know that I was in labour. Within 2 hours of me waking up the app told me it was time to go to the hospital. My contractions definitely became more frequent and much stronger quite quickly and I had started being very sick (which was unexpected and weirdly like a form of pain relief). Once we got to hospital my waters started to trickle as I was walking up the stairs to the birthing suite. As soon as I arrived I was taken straight into the birthing pool and was given gas and air to help with the surges. On arrival at the hospital I was told I was already 5 cm dilated, I couldn’t believe I was in established labour after only 3 hours! A quick 6 hours total labouring and I had gone from 0-10cm. This entire experience was calm, focused, intense and intimate; with my midwife being present but not intrusive. Tony was a constant voice of encouragement, reminding me of my positive affirmations, massaging my back, and keeping me hydrated.

Labouring is intense and you’ve got to dig deep, its important to remain positive and to keep focused on the fact that every surge brings you closer to meeting your baby. If you can do that you get through it positively, it’s mother nature and time evaporates when you are in labour so when people talk about how long there labour was it never actually feels that long when you are living it. Looking back I enjoyed the labour experience it was almost out of body and quite a spiritual experience, the gas and air was so helpful as was the hot water of the birthing pool. Tony put some of my yoga music on in the background and laid out some battery operated candles to create an environment that I would find relaxing.

Once I got to 10cm dilated I felt ready to push, its like a feeling of baring down that can’t be ignored so my midwife told me to go with it. After such a rapid labour, I genuinely thought that I would have delivered him within an hour of pushing maximum (so did my midwife for that matter). However, after 2 hours of pushing he was still not with us which I was beginning to worry about and also to get frustrated with. For a moment I began to doubt myself, maybe I wasn’t pushing correctly? Maybe I wasn’t pushing hard enough? But Tony & my midwife continued to reassure me that I was doing a great job. It turned out that his head was stuck just a couple of cm from the exit. The midwives were concerned that I had been pushing for quite some time and were worried that I was getting exhausted and advised I should accept help getting him out. But as he was absolutely fine in terms of his heart rate and wasn’t in distress I decided to keep going and to try to deliver him naturally! This is where it was good to remind myself and to feel that I was in control of both my body and my baby and no one could force me to accept help if I didn’t want it, it was ultimately my choice. I am a pretty  determined person, so my determination to push ended up at a very long 4 hours 40 minutes of pushing (which tells you if you put your mind to it you can literally push your body to its limits). But, after that amount of time I had to admit that I had absolutely had enough, especially after the empty bowls and vomiting situation, I literally had no fuel left in the tank to give me energy to keep going. After four hours of pushing they realised that his head being stuck was now a real problem and was preventing him from being born so the doctor came and  tried to manually turn his head straight as I pushed so he could make it past my pelvis. However, his head kept going back (he actually sleeps with his head turned to the right like this so we get it now 🤷🏽‍♀️) .

In the end, Tony and I agreed that it simply wasn’t fair on me to keep trying. I was utterly spent, I was actually starting to go a little loopy and I was now causing damage to my pelvic floor and bladder from pushing for so long. We eventually agreed to put my wellbeing and physical health first, so we agreed to go ahead with the episiotomy and ventouse suction cup delivery.

Now, I won’t lie this wasn’t pleasant, I cant describe the feeling so I wont try but it was the only time I really let out a scream but, it was in fact over in less than 15 minutes and once they placed him on my chest I didn’t care about anything else but meeting my baby and all was forgotten.
My doctor & my midwives told us that they had never ever carried out an instrumental delivery in the birthing centre before. However, when they asked me to move to the labour ward I got so upset about having to move to a different, brightly lit, sterile environment that they decided to put my wellbeing first and made the call to move the equipment needed to me instead.
This flexibility meant that despite my birth not going entirely to plan and ending up with instrumental intervention, they allowed me to keep my calm environment consistent helping me to feel safe even when things got difficult.

Despite needing stitches once River arrived my care providers quietly slipped away and allowed me my “golden hour” of skin to to skin to bond with my baby. He latched onto my breast within 20 minutes of being born, before having one hour of skin to skin with Tony whilst I had stitches ect.

My labour & birth was a grand total of 12 hours from start to finish, it was a long one but my beautiful boy is here safely so it was totally worth it and we have already decided we will do it again so it couldn’t of been too bad Lol.

 
 
 
 
 
 

ADVICE…

  • Rest in between surges ie; close your eyes, be quiet almost take mini naps.
  • Drink LOADS of water even if you don’t feel like it, I couldn’t eat at all during labour, I vomited 20-30 times but Tony made me drink 4 litres of water in total and a bottle of iced tea for sugar and the midwives were very happy I managed to stay so hydrated despite the sickness.

 

  • Take a handheld electric fan with you, after two hours of pushing I got quite hot and bothered. Tony holding the fan on me was a godsend.
  • Say yes to the catheter to drain your bladder during labour if you can’t pee, it doesn’t hurt and it helps create space for baby to move down the birth canal.
  • Dextrose tablets helped with energy when I couldn’t eat . During labour move around lots. I got out the pool, I sat on the toilet, I was on all fours, slow dancing with Tony felt good and then being on my back propped up. Just keep changing it up when ever the midwife suggests it.
  • Put music on that you like or helps you remain calm. You won’t hear it, but weirdly the background noise helps you zone out. Get yourself a tens machine for early labour!
  • Take a pillow from home, hospital pillows suck and when you get into bed following delivery you will want to be comfortable for cuddles.

To put your mind at rest, despite covid I had an incredible team of care providers. They did everything normally with a mask added in. They didn’t make my partner wear a mask in the room and they let him bond with us for 8 hours after delivery. River and I were kept in over night and discharged 10pm the following day but I felt safe and cared for even when my partner left. On that note, I want to say a huge thank you to Jo & Cristy my amazing midwives from East Surrey Hospital for taking incredible care of me and baby River, also to Dr Radwah who delivered him safely and moved the theatre to the birthing suite for the first time in her career for me. 

The fourth trimester is feeling a little harder than the birth tbh, mostly as my body is so tired from over 4 hours pushing and the episiotomy and rectal healing from pushing. Recovery has been hard, slow and undignified. But being a new mummy is rewarding and he is breast feeding amazingly despite his little tongue tie which keeps my spirits up. Make sure you check back for my fourth trimester blog post in the near future where I will get into all the ‘post birth stuff’ in more detail.

Mama’s to be… You’ve got this, I promise! My best advice is be prepared, do your pelvic floor exercises and write a detailed birth preferences document for your partner and your midwives and please don’t worry, your going to meet your baby and that is all that matters in the end.

Love Shanie & Baby River xXx

RIVER james ryan SINCLAIR
16/08/2020
7lbs 3

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